It sounds like you’ve been on quite an adventure! You used some beautiful descriptive phrases to help me picture things in my mind. I hope that deer is ok. Next time think about layout as this made it a little confusing.
Hello Anojan, this is an interesting story. I thought it was good just saying you followed the coordinates, rather than telling the reader exactly where you were headed. You provided lots of detail to bring the story to life. I really liked your last three sentences where you listed, what you heard and what you saw. The short, crisp sentences seemed to work well.
Hi Anojan
I enjoyed the way you used the prompt naturally in your 100WC, without describing it too much. The words you chose left a clear picture in my mind of what the character was seeing. Well done.
Mrs P (Team 100WC)
Wellington, New Zealand
Lots of great description in this story, Anojan. I like the way the story moves from being fast paced and even a little scary, with the engine catching on fire, to the clam of the beautiful sunset. And the way you describe the wolves in the far distance means that that calmness lasts right to the end of the story.
Hi Anojan,
It sounds like you’ve been on quite an adventure! You used some beautiful descriptive phrases to help me picture things in my mind. I hope that deer is ok. Next time think about layout as this made it a little confusing.
Keep up the great work.
Mrs M
Hello Anojan, this is an interesting story. I thought it was good just saying you followed the coordinates, rather than telling the reader exactly where you were headed. You provided lots of detail to bring the story to life. I really liked your last three sentences where you listed, what you heard and what you saw. The short, crisp sentences seemed to work well.
Hi Anojan
I enjoyed the way you used the prompt naturally in your 100WC, without describing it too much. The words you chose left a clear picture in my mind of what the character was seeing. Well done.
Mrs P (Team 100WC)
Wellington, New Zealand
Lots of great description in this story, Anojan. I like the way the story moves from being fast paced and even a little scary, with the engine catching on fire, to the clam of the beautiful sunset. And the way you describe the wolves in the far distance means that that calmness lasts right to the end of the story.