Hi Rayyan
You have used all 5 prompt words in a really natural way with this 100WC. As the reader I could easily picture in my mind the environment you were in, and how frustrating it was to have it cut short. What a fabulous author you are.
Mrs P (Team 100WC)
Wellington, New Zealand
I love the adjectives that you included in your story; ferocious, enormous, amazing, fat, smelly, yellow. I could really picture the animals and sights that you described in the zoo trip.
The only minor amendment I would make would be to start with, “My family and I”, rather than “Me and my family”.
This is a very well put together 100WC story and an excellent use of the prompt, it flows so well. I like the way you passed the smelly pile of poo, I don’t think I would have hung around there either. Excellent work, well done.
Hi Rayyan
You have used all 5 prompt words in a really natural way with this 100WC. As the reader I could easily picture in my mind the environment you were in, and how frustrating it was to have it cut short. What a fabulous author you are.
Mrs P (Team 100WC)
Wellington, New Zealand
Hello Rayyan,
I love the adjectives that you included in your story; ferocious, enormous, amazing, fat, smelly, yellow. I could really picture the animals and sights that you described in the zoo trip.
The only minor amendment I would make would be to start with, “My family and I”, rather than “Me and my family”.
Thank you for sharing your writing,
Michelle, Team 100wc,
Melbourne, Australia
Hi Rayyan
This is a very well put together 100WC story and an excellent use of the prompt, it flows so well. I like the way you passed the smelly pile of poo, I don’t think I would have hung around there either. Excellent work, well done.