Day Dreaming Again

This entry was posted in 6F. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Day Dreaming Again

  1. kumar says:

    Amazing story Alima, I really liked how you added all the tension that really sucked me in. A great use of figurative language and powerful adjectives.

    By Ratheena

  2. Laura says:

    Hi Alima,
    well done for using the prompt in this 100wc. It really reminded me of times when I or somebody else is late and all the children’s eyes are glued on them. I just thought straight after I had read this you had experienced it. I loved the the adjectives you used in this phrase ‘my hot tempered teacher face turned crimson red like a ruby glinting in the sunlight’. Well done! To improve you could add some more adventure and make the consequence to her being late more severe.Overall it was an excellent 100wc

  3. Mrs. Mixon (Team 100WC) says:

    Alima, great use of descriptors and figurative language. You really paint a picture of what everything looks like, from the leaves to the face of the teacher. I feel like the end comes quickly though! You might consider more evenly writing about the beginning, middle, and end.

  4. mahms says:

    An amazing tale Alima a very good use of adjectives to create more mood. I have noticed that you wrote ‘Rushed in and open the classroom door.’ It is opened the classroom door.

    From Sara 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *