Wow, that sounds like some very frightening tigers! You did a great job describing things – especially the lines “I shivered in fear” and “the evil tigers surrounded him licking their lips”. Using colorful adjectives really helps the reader see the action in your story. You do need to work on punctuation, though. Keep up the good work!
-Mrs. Harsh (Team 100WC)
What a tense piece of writing! I like how you have kept your main character a mystery. Makes my imagination wonder who he is. Don’t forget to break your sentences up with full stops!
Miss Judd
Mead Primary School
Good piece of writing! You need to work on your spellings and capital letters.
Wow, that sounds like some very frightening tigers! You did a great job describing things – especially the lines “I shivered in fear” and “the evil tigers surrounded him licking their lips”. Using colorful adjectives really helps the reader see the action in your story. You do need to work on punctuation, though. Keep up the good work!
-Mrs. Harsh (Team 100WC)
This story was scary but it had good description was more than excellent
This story was scary but it had good description was more than excellent it was fabulous
What a tense piece of writing! I like how you have kept your main character a mystery. Makes my imagination wonder who he is. Don’t forget to break your sentences up with full stops!
Miss Judd
Mead Primary School