Oh no! I wonder what happens next; I hope you mange to get out safely. Well done Zaeem , you’ve created lots of tension and I’m intrigued to find out how it all began. Try to vary the way you start your sentences.
Miss A
The ‘glaring serpent’ is sending a shiver up my spine! He doesn’t sound the least bit friendly… Well done, Zaeem, lots of suspense and you’ve ended on a good cliff hanger…I wonder what will happen next?
🙂
Hello Zaeem,
Good use of the propped,
Your intro hooked the reader and made me read on,
Next time try and use more powerful words.
FROM: THE MYSTERY MAN?? Who is this?!
Oh no! I wonder what happens next; I hope you mange to get out safely. Well done Zaeem , you’ve created lots of tension and I’m intrigued to find out how it all began. Try to vary the way you start your sentences.
Miss A
The ‘glaring serpent’ is sending a shiver up my spine! He doesn’t sound the least bit friendly… Well done, Zaeem, lots of suspense and you’ve ended on a good cliff hanger…I wonder what will happen next?
🙂
Hello Zaeem,
Good use of the propped,
Your intro hooked the reader and made me read on,
Next time try and use more powerful words.
FROM: THE MYSTERY MAN?? Who is this?!