Hey Karolina, I like your story it creates tension for the reader and creates a picture in my head. However, you can make your words more high level. Such as walking: ambling, scampering etc. Also you can change the last sentence to I was pierced by my skin like a dagger which creates more atmospheric language for the reader. 🙂 Other then that, you have done a marvellous job,
Sara 5A
I like your characteristic storyline, you have used powerful verbs and adjectives. Try to vary your sentence structure and use different punctuation.
Hey Karolina, I like your story it creates tension for the reader and creates a picture in my head. However, you can make your words more high level. Such as walking: ambling, scampering etc. Also you can change the last sentence to I was pierced by my skin like a dagger which creates more atmospheric language for the reader. 🙂 Other then that, you have done a marvellous job,
Sara 5A