Good job Harry, you have described your setting well and your character giving her a motive for murder and plotting how to seem innocent. Just make sure add in missing punctuation and grammar. 🙂
Harry, You have good tension in the story and you’ve used good adjectives to describe what she was planning.
Try to check your punctuation in your story.
Good work!
great work Harry, you have included great atmosphere,
and very good description,
next time add more conjunctions to make the paragraph in the style of the author 🙂
well done
you have very interesting use of vocab and I like that it is relative to the author.
Try to remember dialog goes on another line.
you have used the style of the author.
you have created an atmosphere.
START NEW LINE WHEN YOU USE SPEAACH!!! 🙂
Good job Harry, you have described your setting well and your character giving her a motive for murder and plotting how to seem innocent. Just make sure add in missing punctuation and grammar. 🙂
Harry, You have good tension in the story and you’ve used good adjectives to describe what she was planning.
Try to check your punctuation in your story.
Good work!
Star: You have used the style of the author.
Star: You have created an atmosphere.
Wish: START WITH NEW LINE WHEN YOU USE SPEECH!!! 🙂
great work Harry, you have included great atmosphere,
and very good description,
next time add more conjunctions to make the paragraph in the style of the author 🙂
* WELL DONE FOR USIN DESCRIPTION
* DONE WELL I WANT TO READ ON
w WOULD SHE NEXT NO WHAT WOULD SHE DO NEXT
Star: great work harry you have used some of the success criteria.
Star: you have used commas to create suspense .
wish: speech goes on a new line .
amazing work harry
Star: Good work you have used the criteria.
Star: you have added atmosphere .
Wish: remember to make a space for speech.
You have used great suspense in the story harry well done