Great story Zainab! You have started your story with a question to make the reader want to read on and find out what has happened. You have also written that you (Mary) has fixed everything well you think so, so it makes the reader want to know what you have done and if it was the right thing to do or not. Next time read over your work because some sentences don’t start with a capital letter like the first one in your first paragraph and the first in the second paragraph.
Great story Zainab! You have started your story with a question to make the reader want to read on and find out what has happened. You have also written that you (Mary) has fixed everything well you think so, so it makes the reader want to know what you have done and if it was the right thing to do or not. Next time read over your work because some sentences don’t start with a capital letter like the first one in your first paragraph and the first in the second paragraph.