I completely agree. This is fantastic and has some very powerful imagery and the result is a very emotional poem. The ending in particular is incredibly moving. Well done!
Greetings from Australia Zia. This is a wonderful response to this week’s 100WC. Your careful word choices and use of similes created a vivid scene for me. Writing from a soldier’s point of view requires research and empathy. I think you were able to gauge just the right tone to use. I found the ending poignant. This is a strong piece of writng. Well done!
Zia, your poem is absolutely fantastic. I have not nominated anyone for a showcase yet, so CONGRATULATIONS, you are my first! I loved the way you made the reader feel the poem was in the present tense, right there in the fields, only to find this was a reminiscent thought. You have so many comments, like you are already some superstar writer. I don’t know how old you are but you are at Primary School so this is remarkable. I hope you read my comment Zia, this is marvellous work.
What a fantastic use of description and language, it felt so real. Zia you should be very proud of your achievement , there are not many adults, let alone an right year old, who can capture the audience imagination and taken the brutality and vulnerability of the battlefield and bring it life the way you have! I look forward to reading many more of your creations.
What an impressive poem. This is an amazing piece of descriptive language that transports me to the battle field. Well done Zia I could not be more proud x
Hi Zia!!
I liked your story I liked when you said you missed your friends I also missed some of my friends. Also, I liked how you said the piercing gun shots hurt your tired ears.
Wow! What an amazing poem Zia! I really love all your use of descriptive language. Well done
I completely agree. This is fantastic and has some very powerful imagery and the result is a very emotional poem. The ending in particular is incredibly moving. Well done!
Greetings from Australia Zia. This is a wonderful response to this week’s 100WC. Your careful word choices and use of similes created a vivid scene for me. Writing from a soldier’s point of view requires research and empathy. I think you were able to gauge just the right tone to use. I found the ending poignant. This is a strong piece of writng. Well done!
My gorgeous little man Zia
I’m so proud of you. This is a such an articulate and meaningful poem.
Keep up the good work…..xoxo
Wow an amazing expressive piece of writing.
Well done Zia!
Thank you so so much guys.
Zia, your poem is absolutely fantastic. I have not nominated anyone for a showcase yet, so CONGRATULATIONS, you are my first! I loved the way you made the reader feel the poem was in the present tense, right there in the fields, only to find this was a reminiscent thought. You have so many comments, like you are already some superstar writer. I don’t know how old you are but you are at Primary School so this is remarkable. I hope you read my comment Zia, this is marvellous work.
Amazingly evocative heartfelt words, stirring the depths of my being.
Powerful
Emotional
Unique
Gripping
Inspired
Wonderful!
An evocative poem that stirs the core.
Truly inspired!
Well done.
I’m so impressed with the skill and artistry you have demonstrated in your writing.
You’ve conjured something quite magical here, I’m looking forward to your recital.
X
What a fantastic use of description and language, it felt so real. Zia you should be very proud of your achievement , there are not many adults, let alone an right year old, who can capture the audience imagination and taken the brutality and vulnerability of the battlefield and bring it life the way you have! I look forward to reading many more of your creations.
Well done Zia! Excellent work, and great use of emotion.
My amazing boy zia
So emotional and yet so powerful.
Well done zia I’m really proud of you.
Amazing words from such a amazing little man.
Well done Zia for being selected for this week’s showcase. A fantastic achievement.
What an impressive poem. This is an amazing piece of descriptive language that transports me to the battle field. Well done Zia I could not be more proud x
Wow!
What a good poem, i loved it so much the opening was amazing also the ending
From somran
p.s Well done for winning!!!!
what a fabulous price of writing Zia, I loved the words you used!
Hi Zia!!
I liked your story I liked when you said you missed your friends I also missed some of my friends. Also, I liked how you said the piercing gun shots hurt your tired ears.
Fab peice of writing I love how you said ‘the piercing gun shots hurt your tired ears.’
I am so proud of you zia, truly thought provoking, and very moving