Great story Imani it was really good, the way you have used lots of description and adjectives as well as adverbs it has the strong ability of giving the reader the power to picture what is happening in the story. However you could improve on missing punctuation like with oceans timeless… So also explain what ‘ flotsam ‘ is.
Sara, I would like to thank you for commenting on my work firstly, and secondly for your helpful feedback. Though I would like to know how i could improve.
~Imani~
Great story Imani it was really good, the way you have used lots of description and adjectives as well as adverbs it has the strong ability of giving the reader the power to picture what is happening in the story. However you could improve on missing punctuation like with oceans timeless… So also explain what ‘ flotsam ‘ is.
Yumna, Year 6, Mead school
Dear Yumna,
I am glad to know that you are here to read my work, although there is such thing as the dictionary…
IT’S VERY USEFUL!!!!!!
~Imani~
I really like your description it is built up with a lot of adjectives etc.
From Sara 🙂
Sara, I would like to thank you for commenting on my work firstly, and secondly for your helpful feedback. Though I would like to know how i could improve.
~Imani~