I like your story it is very descriptive you added a lot of punctuation. I liked as you added eclipse’s at the end of your story, the prompt as it shivered, they is in a suitable place. I also like you put onapatophia crunch.
From Sara
Imani this is a beautifully crafted tale and you are a truly gifted story writer. I especially liked the phrases, “My small ball of courage had crumbled long since; my eyes widened,” and, “As I walked down the path, the moon sneered down at my expense…” Next time, just before publishing your post, double check for any typing mistakes. As always, I look forward to reading your next tale.
Thank you for pointing out the fact that I should double check, for that will be my top priority before I publish. Also another great thank you for taking your time to read my story, Crunch! and your fantastically generous response towards my work, and I too look forward to writing more. And yet another great thanks for motivating me! 🙂
Brilliant story Imani, I liked it when you added the eclipse’s at the end, it made dramatic tensions. You created allot of atmosphere and that technique wanted me to read more. You really made me eager to read more. It is just too bad you only can write 100 words, because if you did write more than 100 words your story would be spectacular.
I liked it when you used allot of powerful adjectives and onomatopoeia’s like Crunch.
I like your story it is very descriptive you added a lot of punctuation. I liked as you added eclipse’s at the end of your story, the prompt as it shivered, they is in a suitable place. I also like you put onapatophia crunch.
From Sara
Imani this is a beautifully crafted tale and you are a truly gifted story writer. I especially liked the phrases, “My small ball of courage had crumbled long since; my eyes widened,” and, “As I walked down the path, the moon sneered down at my expense…” Next time, just before publishing your post, double check for any typing mistakes. As always, I look forward to reading your next tale.
Thank you for pointing out the fact that I should double check, for that will be my top priority before I publish. Also another great thank you for taking your time to read my story, Crunch! and your fantastically generous response towards my work, and I too look forward to writing more. And yet another great thanks for motivating me! 🙂
Brilliant story Imani, I liked it when you added the eclipse’s at the end, it made dramatic tensions. You created allot of atmosphere and that technique wanted me to read more. You really made me eager to read more. It is just too bad you only can write 100 words, because if you did write more than 100 words your story would be spectacular.
I liked it when you used allot of powerful adjectives and onomatopoeia’s like Crunch.
Keep Writing Imani!
Ratheena