The Saturday by Robert Maries

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4 Responses to The Saturday by Robert Maries

  1. Rayyan says:

    Hi,
    I love your story and I like how you built suspense with you sentence structure.

  2. szabo says:

    I think your post is very good. but you should vary your adjectives a lot.

  3. mugub says:

    I like the suspense in your story. Add some more adjectives.

  4. nanand says:

    Hi Robert,

    I really liked the way you stressed the strangeness of it all by repeatedly telling me what you expected to be happening and what then wasn’t to create tension. Next time try to vary your sentence lengths to create effects.

    Mrs Moore

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