This was really fascinating, I like your adverbs, extremely and luckily. You used a good range of vocabulary, but how about some more adjectives? From Hannan at Mead School.
Syed speaking, The way you did your writing was excellent and I like the way how created the atmosphere and how you put in the problem where a teenager was coming home from work however his flash light and his brakes were broken, then I liked the way you then put in the solution where no body will be around so it will be alright the luckily it was not the motor way so it did have street lights here.
Keep writing Dylan because you are awesome fantastic boss epic cool……….
A nice piece of writing Dylan. You have described the atmosphere very well. The feel of your story matches the picture prompt perfectly. Well done, keep up your 100 word challenges!
Hi Dylan – greetings from suburban Chicago, IL, USA
Very imaginative tale for your 100WC this week. Your first few sentences really draw the reader into the scene. How terrifying when the teenager was struck by a hit and run driver. I was thankful there was someone there to help him. Keep up the good work!
This was really fascinating, I like your adverbs, extremely and luckily. You used a good range of vocabulary, but how about some more adjectives? From Hannan at Mead School.
Syed speaking, The way you did your writing was excellent and I like the way how created the atmosphere and how you put in the problem where a teenager was coming home from work however his flash light and his brakes were broken, then I liked the way you then put in the solution where no body will be around so it will be alright the luckily it was not the motor way so it did have street lights here.
Keep writing Dylan because you are awesome fantastic boss epic cool……….
A nice piece of writing Dylan. You have described the atmosphere very well. The feel of your story matches the picture prompt perfectly. Well done, keep up your 100 word challenges!
Hi Dylan – greetings from suburban Chicago, IL, USA
Very imaginative tale for your 100WC this week. Your first few sentences really draw the reader into the scene. How terrifying when the teenager was struck by a hit and run driver. I was thankful there was someone there to help him. Keep up the good work!