Hi Iva, You have created an interesting character for your reader and used detail well to influence your reader’s opinion.
Next time edit to make sure your tenses are consistent.
Mrs M
Think about the language you use. “Crazy stuff” doesn’t seem the right words to describe the actions of a demon as scary as Lightning. I was surprised to read that Lightening had died because she seems so powerful.
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Hi Iva,
You have created an interesting character for your reader and used detail well to influence your reader’s opinion.
Next time edit to make sure your tenses are consistent.
Mrs M
Think about the language you use. “Crazy stuff” doesn’t seem the right words to describe the actions of a demon as scary as Lightning. I was surprised to read that Lightening had died because she seems so powerful.