Hi Rakeen,
I like the way you have opened your myth, using lots of detail to engage your reader and place your story firmly in the world of myths. As you continue, I suggest you always make time for proof- reading as I can spot some errors in your grammar and punctuation.
Looking forward to hearing about what happens to Slice.
Mrs M
Hello there,
This sounds like the start of an interesting and action packed myth, with quite an interesting hero at the helm of the action. As the story continues , make sure that your link between parts and events are clear, using conjunctions may help you with that.
English Advisor
Manchester
Hi Rakeen,
I like the way you have opened your myth, using lots of detail to engage your reader and place your story firmly in the world of myths. As you continue, I suggest you always make time for proof- reading as I can spot some errors in your grammar and punctuation.
Looking forward to hearing about what happens to Slice.
Mrs M
Hello there,
This sounds like the start of an interesting and action packed myth, with quite an interesting hero at the helm of the action. As the story continues , make sure that your link between parts and events are clear, using conjunctions may help you with that.
English Advisor
Manchester