The unknown cure by hafsa and zahrah

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7 Responses to The unknown cure by hafsa and zahrah

  1. nanand says:

    Hi girls,
    What wonderful use of description to move the story on and influence my opinion. Next time think about how you could vary sentence structures to create effects.
    I enjoyed reading this.
    Mrs M

  2. Yasin says:

    HAFSA GREAT WORK I LOVE HOW YOU USED DIFFERENT ADJECTIVES TO DESCRIBE THE CHARACTERS I ALSO LIKED HOW YOU TALKED ABOUT HOW THE PRINCESS FELT

    Yasin hafsa’s cousin

  3. hussz3 says:

    Very well written Zahrah. Good use of adjectives. Good descriptive writing.

  4. hussz3 says:

    Thanks for the comments. Next time I will try and use more sentence starters.

  5. hussz3 says:

    Thank you for the comments. Next time I will try and use more better sentence starters.

  6. khanm says:

    I like how you used adjectives!
    I like how you called her the queen of cold!
    She replied she was as cold as a wintery night but she got the ocean blanket!

  7. MICAH CHARM says:

    I like the way you used different colours, and
    you used descriptive words that people don’t use I really liked it.

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