Haunted House Zaynab

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4 Responses to Haunted House Zaynab

  1. chows says:

    Wow Zayanab your work was really awesome! I’ll give you a star: Good punctuation ; good adjectives!
    Wish: more similes, metaphors and personification

  2. islas1 says:

    I like how it ended because it says no think after it

  3. Secret Book Club Member says:

    I love the way in this story you have used descriptions about what the child sees, hears and feels, using sensory descriptions is a great way to engage the reader. I look forward to your next story.

  4. mahms says:

    I like your story it is good but to improve it you can add some semi-colons.
    From Sara

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