Hi Arojan,
This was a delight to read! You used precise details really well to get across all the chaos that would be created if we did suddenly find ourselves without gravity. You need to help your reader understand how you jump between characters, a simple phrase like ‘ meanwhile in another part of town’ will help them follow you.
Well done.
Mrs M
that was an amazing story and very fun to listen to
to improve you can tell me a bit more about the other 2 friends that was in the picture
Hi Arojan,
This was a delight to read! You used precise details really well to get across all the chaos that would be created if we did suddenly find ourselves without gravity. You need to help your reader understand how you jump between characters, a simple phrase like ‘ meanwhile in another part of town’ will help them follow you.
Well done.
Mrs M